12 Most Magical Secrets to Capture a Woman’s Heart

12 Most Magical Secrets to Capture a Woman’s Heart

Speaking from the perspective of a guy, you want so badly to win the girl. But every time you approach her, she makes you feel like an idiot. You get tongue-tied and can’t seem to do anything right. To add to your frustration, as soon as you walk away from her, you return to your normal strong and confident self.

There is nothing more you want than to make her fall in love with you. She longs for magic as much as you do.

So, let me tell you some secrets that will capture her heart. I promise you that if you master these 12 steps, or even attempt to, magic is what you will create and, believe me, she will soon be bragging to her friends about how wonderful you are.

1. Don’t just take her in your arms, show your strength in how you hold her

A woman longs for a place of safety and protection where she can rest, feel safe and just “be.” Your arms around her symbolize that place. I am not talking a wimpy half hug with a pat on the back. I am talking about a holding that has the strength of a fortress in it.

Did you know that this kind of hug actually releases serotonin in a woman’s brain — the “feel good” hormone? You can bring her the reassurance that everything is going to be alright in this simple way.

2. Describe to her how beautiful she is through your eyes

As much as a woman may push your compliments away, she needs to hear them. Rejecting those words is often a sign that she may be struggling to believe it’s true or she thinks you just want something. This has been her experience in the past.

Consider what you see that is truly amazing about her. Describe that to her in as many ways as you can while you hug her, text her, surprise her with a phone call out of the blue.

Push through her resistance until she begins to believe you.

3. Melt her with the “Soul Gaze”

We learned the amazing art of the Soul Gaze through a tantric sex book called Soul Sex written by Al Link and Pala Copeland. My sweet man makes the effort every now and then to look deeply into my eyes with the intention of understanding what is going on inside of me. He doesn’t say anything for a full minute or so.

He just looks. Remember how you couldn’t stop looking at her when you first met? Go back there. Use it to tell her you really want to “see her.” Hold her eyes. Be steady. Focus only on her in that moment. It takes practice but the fact that you want to do this will eventually blow her away.

4. Don’t be afraid of her feelings — they will lead you to her thoughts

How often I have heard, “You shouldn’t feel that way.” It’s pointless to say that to a woman as her feelings are always hanging out all over the place. If you want to bring back her smile, encourage her to say how she feels. You process in your head.

A woman will process out loud. It’s like she is dumping it all out on the table so she can see it. Suddenly she has clarity and she knows what comes next. Don’t offer your opinion or advice unless she asks for it. Believe me, this will build her trust in you and how much you care for her.

5. Laugh with her over your 15 minute attention span guideline

I love Tony Robbin’s “Field Report” explanation regarding male/female communication. A man is a hunter — out to shoot the deer to bring home food for the winter. He is focused and to the point.

A woman is a gatherer, a berry picker with an eye on the fields, collecting all other things her family requires. Her perspective is broad and, combined with her need to process verbally, she can go on and on when describing her day or a situation. Being a man, you want to get to the point and fix it, catch it, finish it.

So laugh with her about that and let her know that you are more than happy to listen in short 15 minute bouts set up as much as possible as bullet points.

6. Keep your conversations spicy by appreciating a woman who has her own opinions

You are a man and your objective in life is to conquer. If you are a climber, you learn everything there is to know about climbing. If you are a mechanic, you tinker, you experiment, you take things apart until you master them. So apply this to your lady.

Study her. Ask her what she thinks and why. Make it your objective to know her better than anyone else and, even if you don’t understand her viewpoint, respect it. Accept it as part of her individuality and, if she doesn’t agree with your opinions, stop considering it a threat. It makes her interesting.

7. Master her likes and dislikes as though accepting a challenge

In the same way, just as you know the game of hockey inside and out, learn to understand what she likes and doesn’t like. Be attuned to words like, “I don’t want…” or “It drives me crazy when…” and even more so when she says things like, “I love…” or “Someday let’s…” What follows is crucial. They tell you how to make her happy.

Your challenge is to make as many things happen as you can. Keep in mind that is isn’t always about the big house or the bank account. It’s the small things that make her everyday life more pleasant. So fix the cupboard door or take her for her favorite food or give her a rest break from the kids but still be planning her dream vacation on the side.

8. Use your ability to strategize to make her dreams come true

You want that quad or that sailboat or that promotion so badly you can taste it. And you go after it. The hunter focus makes you amazing at strategizing. So turn some of that focus toward your lady’s dreams.

From your logical perspective, you may see them as impossible or unrealistic. However, they are her dreams. You don’t have God’s ability to dictate what is in her heart to do with her life so watch and learn. Begin to draw them out of her and encourage her vision. Talk with her about steps she could take. You could make it happen if you work alongside of her. Imagine what this could do for your relationship.

9. Decide to meet her needs — even if you don’t know what they are yet

Like you, she has a deep need for what makes her feel secure, safe and significant. She longs for love, fun and purpose in life. If you know her as well as you know your truck, you will discover simple ways that create an atmosphere in which she can thrive and grow rather than be strangled and oppressed.

So ask her, “What would make you feel safe?” “What would make you feel loved?” “What makes you feel special?” Then experiment. Find the right mix. You will begin to see her light up from the inside out.

10. Watch for the easy ways to sweep her off her feet

Besides wanting a man to “see” her, the #2 most common wish among women I have connected with is that they be cherished. Adore who she is, treat her like gold, open doors for her, be concerned for her rest, her happiness, her well-being. Care about her, talk gently to her, cuddle her, pay attention to her. Wrap not only your arms around her but your love. Make her comfort your first priority over your work, your hobbies, your fun. The results will amaze you.

11. Step up to protect her in every way you can

She wants a champion, a Knight in Shining Armor. So be sure her car is running smoothly. Don’t make her feel foolish, ever, by mocking her or teasing her about things that hurt. Stick up for her to your friends and in front of your children. Insist she be treated with respect by your family.

Take her to the doctor when she’s sick. Watch her back. Challenge her in the way she asks to be challenged in areas where she feels she is letting herself down.

As a man, you are inherently a Protector. Draw fully up into that identity when it comes to her. Be her safe place where she can say anything, dream anything, be afraid of anything and not be judged.

12. Let her storms blow over you not defeat you

Again, emotions run strongly in a woman. She swings from peace to turmoil all day. And sometimes she needs to blow. It takes a strong man to stand there and let the storm hit him full force.

Listen for the fear behind the words. Even if they seem as if they are an attack on you, hear the insecurity, the alarm bells going off inside of her. Wait for the lull that follows when the storm is over. Tears will open up blue skies.

Then it will be time to ask, “What are you afraid of?” This will be your chance to calm those fears, say you are sorry and talk about what you can do that will serve as middle ground for both of you. Storms can teach you a lot and the more you let her talk things out, the fewer there will be. Besides, you know what they say about make-up sex .

The magic of this kind of intimate connection with your lady is well worth pursuing. Put on your hunter garb and pull out your laser focus. The prey is her heart.

Instead of running away, run toward it. Make it an adventure. Are you up for it?

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